This is my personal blog. The views expressed here do not necessarily represent those of the congregations I serve.

Friday, April 24, 2015

Holy Humor Sunday.

Here are some resources I wrote for Holy Humor Sunday (4/12), the Sunday After Easter.   

Call to Worship

Groovy is the gang of goodness,
the posse of peace, 
the coterie of the copacetic,
the flock of faith,
the minyan of the merciful,
the horde of the happy,
the tribe of the true,
the nation, no
the universe! no
the multi-verse, 
or maybe the super-symmetry,
(depending on which school of physics you prefer),
of the Dad, the Dude, and the… Bird/flame/wind thing,
from now till… whenever….
Amen.
(Sometimes I wonder about these contemporary liturgies.)

Filling the Baptismal Font

Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus 
were baptized into his death? 

Death?  Seriously?  That wasn’t in the brochure.

Therefore we have been buried with him by baptism into death, 

Wouldn’t this go better if we didn’t talk about death so much?
I’m just saying.

So that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, 

Wait.  
“Raised from the dead”?  
What’s up with that?

Stop interrupting me.
So we too might walk in newness of life. Romans 6:3, 4
You’ll see.  Or not.
And it was in the brochure.

In any case, trust me on this:
remember your baptism, and be thankful!

Confession 

God of laughter:
Are we not just hilarious?
With our blindness, our contradictions, our ironies?

Is our existence not just slapstick?

You created the world and us very good,

Yet we’re suspicious, asking, “What’s the catch?”

You place us in a magnificent, abundant, beautiful garden,

Which we proceed to take apart.

We painstakingly identify and extract the specks from the eyes of others,

While our own eyes are blocked by veritable logs.

We are meticulous about our religious duties,

But if you’re different we refuse to talk to you.

We mobilize to save a kitten in a tree,

Then we let whole species go extinct every day.

Are not our relationships like roller-coasters?

Is not the Parkway like watching bumper-cars?

We react in rage at our enemies’ atrocities,

But when our friends bomb children we shrug or make excuses.

We proudly take the Bible literally,

Except for the inconvenient or challenging parts.

We proclaim our freedom!

While we carefully do what everyone else does.

We present a brave, pious, competent, and joyful face to the world,

While inside we are broken, confused, and unspeakably sad.

We blindfold ourselves and spin ourselves in circles,

Then we are surprised and angry when we can’t see and fall over.

O Lord, how do you stop laughing at us?

O Lord, how do you stop crying for us?

Open our eyes and hearts, Lord,
that we may move from tragic and laughable ineptitude
to true joy in your Spirit.

You turn our mourning into dancing,
and our tears into exultation!

Blessed be your holy Name, O God!

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